Jeune Street

McSweeney’s publishes God’s resignation letter in full:

All in all, I think pretty much everyone can agree that I did my job to the best of abilities. My Earth accomplishments speak for themselves. I worked tirelessly for the Earth. Think of all the great stuff I’ve made in my time as God:

− Fire

− The Renaissance

− Mario Batali

− the iPhone

People rag on me a lot. I mean a lot of people love me, but generally I get a lot of flak. It’s pretty insane − my staff and I spend most of our day dealing with other people’s PETTY grievances instead of progressing our planet now. I know I promised no more “lording as usual,” but THIS isn’t what anyone had in mind for EARTH.

Totally understandable.